3D Model: An Abandoned Warehouse

Notes of a Noob Animator

I finished writing a short story What’s the Point? on Friday and published all the parts on my Facebook page by this week. But Facebook pages are quite unintuitive for writing long content. You cannot even bolden or italicize the text. That’s why I am republishing the short story, one part each Saturday, on Stories of Sandeept,

I wanted to put at least one image related to the part. For the first part, I decided to make an abandoned warehouse. It’s where all the drama takes place. It had to be dramatic. However, I had never modeled a proper house before.

The first version of warehouse was an extended cube an a plane modeled into corrugated sheet. Then I added a shutter and painted some moss using GIMP. It looked awful.

The first version of Warehouse

This morning, I found two videos (embedded below) from CG Essentials, which gave…

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Two South Korean Movies I watched this Week

I watched two South Korean movies this week: Train to Busan (2016) and Silenced (2011). Both of them coincidentally starred Gong Yoo and Yu-mi Jung as the leads. I had heard of Train to Busan as one of the best horror movies showing zombie apocalypse, but it felt like a drama for the most part. Silenced, on the other hand is categorized as drama but it shows the horror of being under-privileged in the society. In this blog, I am presenting short reviews of both the movies.

1. Train to Busan (2016)

In this movie, Seok-Woo (Gong Yoo) is taking his daughter, Soo-an (Su-an Kim) to her mother from Seoul to Busan during a zombie apocalypse. The zombie virus originates through a leak in a biochemical factory. The virus is spreading on the scales of a pandemic. People are getting crazy and cannibalistic. But the apocalypse is only a set-up to show the horrors of society.

Seok-Woo is a workaholic, who thinks only about himself. Soo-an, the daughter, is polite and selfless. She is the heart and soul of the movie. Her interactions with the other passengers show to her father that one should never be selfish, even in worse of times. However, the world has mean people, too. The acts of one selfish person can jeopardize the lives of other people. The movie also shows that good people can follow bad people out of fear and can make irrational decisions. Thus, this movie is an excellent commentary on the society.

The zombies in this did not scare me but thought that I might act selfishly in times of apocalypse or pandemic scared me. We saw how some selfish people created the global pandemic of COVID-19. Those memories made Train to Busan even more scarier. Is a selfish society more dangerous than a pandemic or apocalypse? Yes, I think it is.

2. Silenced (2011)

Silenced is based on real events that happened at a school for the hearing-impaired in 2005. I had watched a review (before watching the movie) on the YouTube channel Accented Cinema and had not been able to stop my tears. It took me a couple of weeks to gain courage to watch this movie.

Kang In-ho is a new art teacher at a school for disabled in Mujin. He loves art but cannot pursue his passion his wife died, his daughter is sick. To end his financial problems, he steps into the school thinking it might help his career. But the teachers, including the principal, are repeatedly sexually assaulting students. Despite all odds against him, In-ho decides to fight for justice with the help of an activist Seo Yoo-jin.

The school administration, however, has been bribing the police, education office, and “doing charities”. In-ho and Yoo-jin are helpless against the priviledged criminals. I was expecting them to succeed but the movie shows their failure. For the under-priviledged, the lack of justice is not only a tragedy, it is also a horror.

Nations were built in the past so that everyone could get security and justice. But over time, the fight for justice has been huge struggle for common people, even in prosperous nations. Silenced exposed the flaws in judiciary system of South Korea. The movie became such a strong voice that the existing laws were amended and the culprits were given harsher punishment.

This movie shows how powerful a cinema can be. A movie was able to change the laws of the nation. This is what movies or any art form should strive to do–change the society for good.

कलाकारको सम्मान र सम्पदा संरक्षणमा उदासीनता

एकाबिहानै एउटा समाचारमा आँखा पर्‍यो । मनमा चस्स बिझायो । स्वर सम्राट नारायण गोपालको घर सङ्कटमा रहेछ । समाचारमा लेखिएको रहेछ–देवकोटाको घर पुनःनिर्माण हुन लागे पनि स्वर सम्राट नारायण गोपालको घर वेवास्तामा परेको छ । देवकोटाको घर पनि संरक्षण गरिएको चैं हैन । पूरै भत्काएर गरिएको पुनःनिर्माण हो । नयाँ बनाइएको घरमा पुरानो जत्तिको महत्व नहोला । वास्तवमा, हामीले सम्मान गर्दै आएका साहित्यकार र कलाकारका अमूल्य सम्पत्तिको रक्षा हामीले गर्नै सकेका छैनौँ ।

हामी साहित्य र कलालाई सम्मान गर्नै जान्दैनौँ । प्राचीन र मध्यकालीन कलाकार (मूर्तिकार, चित्रकार, वास्तुकलाविद्, साहित्यकार) हरू को सूची हामीसँग छैन । एकजना अरनिको प्रसिद्ध छन् मूर्तिकला र वास्तुकलामा, त्यो पनि चीन गएर सम्मानित भएकाले । सानै उमेरमा चीन जाने टोलीको नेतृत्व गर्ने अरनिकोले नेपालमा सिर्जना गरेका कलाहरू केके हुन् ? अरनिकोको वास्तविक नाम र ठेगानाका बारेमा पनि अझै अन्जान छु । अध्ययन भएको होला तर कुनै पाठ्यक्रममा पढ्ने मौका पाएको छैन । विदेशमा ख्याति नपाएसम्म आजपनि राज्यले चिन्दैन । परम्परा किन छोड्नु, हैन ?

मल्लकालका केही साहित्य र साहित्यकारका नाम सामान्य ज्ञानका किताबमा भेटिन्छ । त्यसबेलाका राजाहरू नै साहित्यकार ! पढ्ने लेख्ने राजाहरू मात्रै भएर हो कि ? जसले लेखेपनि ती महत्त्वपूर्ण ग्रन्थहरू र तिनमा के छ्न् भन्ने कुरा विद्यालयदेखि नै पढाइनु पर्ने हो । तर पाठ्यक्रम निर्माण गर्नेहरू आफ्ना कमसल लेखहरू पाठ्यक्रममा राख्न तत्पर छन् ।

आधुनिक नेपालमा (पहिले पर्वते या खसकुरा भनिने) नेपालीलाई केन्द्रविन्दुमा राखियो । सुवानन्द दासले लेखेको “पृथ्वीनारायण” काव्य नेपालीको पहिलो साहित्य भनेर घोकेको छु तर त्यसमा ठ्याक्कै के छ थाहा छैन । मोतीराम भट्टले नभेटेका भए भानुभक्त आचार्यलाई कतै गुमनाम हुने थिए । महत्त्व दिइएको भाषाका साहित्य पनि संरक्षित छैनन् । नेपाल भाषा, मैथिली, अवधी, तामाङ, किराँती लगायतका भाषा र जनजातिका साहित्य संरक्षण हुने कुरै भएन ।

सरकार त उदासीन भयो भयो, हाम्रा केही साहित्यकारहरू क्रान्तिकारी बन्ने नाममा इतिहासको संरक्षण नगरे पनि हुन्छ भन्ने विचार राख्छ्न् । देवकोटाको घर भत्काइएको विषयमा एकजना “लेखक”ले त्यो घर जोगाइयोस् या भत्काइयोस् मतलब भएन भन्ने आशयको ट्विट गरेपछि एउटा लेख नै लेखेको थिएँ । नारायण गोपालको घरको संरक्षण गर्ने विषयमा पनि उनको विचार जान्न मन लागेको छ ।

Finishing the Fifth Draft of a Story

I want to write every day but I don’t. Most of the times, I am so lazy that I don’t want to lift my pen. Sometimes, the things I’m writing is too personal and sometimes, the stuff I write makes me uncomfortable.

Right now, I am writing a story. I’m still not writing daily but I am more regular than before. I finished the fifth draft (fourth complete draft) today. Every draft has changed the way I am looking into the characters and the plot. The overall theme and plot has remained the same but the way to get to them have been varied.

I also found a way to calm my inner editor. Every time I see a problem, I promise myself to look into it in the next draft. Following expert advice, I used to wait for some time to revise. This time, however, I am not waiting. As soon as I finish one version, I begin another. It’s helping me a lot in remembering the things I wanted to change and it has also helped me regain confidence in writing.

I hope to complete the story in the next couple of drafts. Then I will move on to the next thing I have on my mind. Wish me luck!

Invisible

Until recently, I had not realized that I have become invisible on social media. I am there but I am not. As someone who finds it difficult to chat or call on regular basis, it has always been difficult to maintain friendship on social media. I have also been tired of thankless favours they ask me. Still, I’m scared of losing them.

Since the Covid-19 lockdown in Chait 2076 (April 2020), a lot of things have happened. These one-and-a-half years have been mostly unproductive. I have not written much. Neither did I make any progress in academics. I invested my last six months to qualify for government services but the exams have been stalled and now I feel like am in a limbo. I learnt a few stuffs related to art and animation but I haven’t turned them into anything productive.

But maybe I am thinking productivity in terms of monetary gains only. My parents say knowledge never goes to waste no matter how difficult gaining it might be. My lack of knowledge on simplest of the things related to my thesis work was one of the reasons I decided not to complete it within Bhadau this year. On top of that the errors I had made were fatal. They should have never made way into my research. I’ll be improving on it for sure so that my step back can help me leap forward.

Despite my fears, I am hoping for the best. I have more time for preparation of exams. I have more time for my research. I have more time for family. I have more time to make connections. All I want to do is not become invisible.

नेपाली साहित्यमा देखिएका केही निराशाजनक दृश्यहरू

यसै साता महाकवि लक्ष्मीप्रसाद देवकोटाको घर प्रज्ञा प्रतिष्ठानले भत्कायो । तर्क थियो, “घर जीर्ण थियो । सबलीकरण गर्न भन्दा भत्काएर नयाँ बनाउन सस्तो पर्ने भयो । नयाँ भवन सङ्ग्रहालय बन्छ । के नराम्रो हुन्छ र ?”

वाहियात तर्क गर्न, कानूनका छिद्र समात्न र दलका पछि लागेर विद्वान हुँ भन्दै हाँक दिन नेपालका प्राज्ञिक भनाउँदाहरूको विशेषता नै हो । उनीहरूमा न इतिहासको चेत छ न त भविष्यको सही योजना नै । ध्यान छ त केबल आत्मरति, अलिकति धन र नचाहिने कुरा गर्न ।

आम सर्वसाधारणलाई महाकवि देवकोटाको घर भत्काइँदैछ भनेर सचेत नगराउने “अभियन्ता” र मिडिया अर्को ठूलो समस्याका रूपमा अघि बढेका छन् । नेपालीमै लेख्ने एकजना “साहित्यकार”को ट्वीटले नेताहरूले रोपेको जातीय/भाषिक द्वेषयुक्त राजनीतिको प्रभाव प्रष्ट देखाएको छ । वर्तमानमा सुधार चाहने, अरू भाषाको उत्थान चाहने उनलाई नेपाली भाषासँग चैं समस्या किन छ ? नेपाली भाषालाई मात्रै महत्त्व दिने नीति कुनै बेला राज्यले लिएको थियो तर अब अरू भाषा संस्कृतिको संरक्षणको कुरा गर्दा नेपालीलाई बाहिर राख्नुपर्ने हो ? कुनै यो विषयमा नाम चलेका “फुल टाइम व्यावसायिक” लेखकहरूको मौनता अर्को दु:खद पाटो हो । इतिहासको सम्मान नगर्ने उनीहरू वर्तमानमा सम्मान पुगेन भन्न कसरी सक्छन् ? भविष्यमा तिनका नाम मेटिँदैन भन्ने के छ ?

अघिल्लो साता मदन पुरस्कारको छनौटमा परेका उत्कृष्ट पुस्तकहरू मध्ये एक पुस्तक यस्तो पनि थियो जसले वर्ग विभेदलाई प्रश्रय दिएको थियो । एक चोटि मात्रै छापिने र प्रिअर्डर गरेकाले मात्रै पाउने भनिएको उक्त कथा-सङ्ग्रह बजारमा सहजै पाइन थालेको सुनेको छु । प्रकाशक र पाठकसँग सिधै सम्पर्क बनाएको, वितरकलाई बीचमा आउन नदिएको भन्ने प्रकाशक अझै पनि नयाँ छापिँदैन भनिरहेका छन् । तर “आउट अफ स्टक” भनिएका ठाउँमा पनि फेरि बिक्री भइरहेको छ । अर्थात् प्रकाशकले प्रिअर्डरबाट मात्रै बिक्री गरेको भने पनि अलिकति सचेत पाठकले त्यो पत्याइहाल्ने स्थिति छैन ।

अनि लेखक भक्ति पनि मज्जैले देख्न पाइयो यो हप्ता । आफूलाई मन पर्ने लेखकको किताबको कमजोरी अरू पाठकले औँल्याउँदा लेखकमाथिको आक्रमण गरेको भन्ने विद्वान् पनि देखियो । पाठकले प्रतिक्रिया दिँदैमा कुनै लेखकका फ्यान त्यसरी उत्रिनु नै अनौठो लाग्यो । यस्तो भक्तिले त लेखकले सधैं पोजिटिभ रिभ्यु मात्र पाउँछ । जे लेखे पनि हुन्छ भन्ने मानसिकता उसमा हाबी हुन थाल्छ । लेखनको गुणस्तर स्वाभाविक रूपमा घट्छ । यो साहित्यको लागि कदापि राम्रो हुन सक्दैन ।

पाठक प्रतिक्रियालाई व्यक्तिगत आक्रमण ठान्ने, प्रकाशकले दिनदहाडै लुट्ने अनि प्राज्ञहरूले प्राज्ञिक धर्म पूरा नगर्ने प्रवृति नेपाली साहित्यलाई अधोगतितर्फ लान उद्दत रहेका छ्न् । सचेत पाठक, पाठकलाई सम्मान गर्ने लेखक/प्रकाशक र सही एजेन्डा बोकेका प्राज्ञ नभएसम्म नेपाली साहित्यलाई सही बाटो देखाउन गाह्रो पर्ने देखिन्छ ।

घनचक्कर: भुल्भुलैया र भविस्यवाणी

“घनचक्कर” उपन्यास विशाल मिलन केन्द्र, चण्डोलले आयोजना गरेको एउटा प्रतियोगितामा पुरस्कारका रूपमा पाएको थिएँ । पन्ध्र वर्षको उमेर, उपन्यास पढ्ने तीव्र हुटहुटी ! नयाँ किताब समाएपछि बिहानदेखि साँझसम्म नबिसाई पढिसकेको थिएँ । सकिँदासम्म उपन्यासको ‘म’ पात्र सँगसँगै आफू पनि पागल त भइनँ जस्तो लागेको थियो । उपन्यासका राजनीतिक विषय केही बुझे पनि गहिराईमा चाहिँ पुग्न सकेको थिइनँ ।

त्यस यता एसएलसी, बाह्र र ब्याचलर पास गरिसकेपछि “घनचक्कर” पढेको थिएँ । प्रत्येक चोटि नयाँ अनुभव भएको थियो । नयाँ रहस्य खुलेका थिए । देशका घनचक्करहरू अलि बढी बुझ्दै गएर होला ।
मास्टर्स पढ्न कीर्तिपुर भर्ना भएदेखि नै “घनचक्कर” फेरि पढ्ने अनि समीक्षा लेख्ने इच्छा थियो । दरबारमार्ग, शहीदगेट, कालीमाटी, बल्खु हुँदै कीर्तिपुर पुग्दा कयौंपटक उपन्यासका दृश्यहरू आँखामा नाच्थे । बाटामा पुलिसहरू देख्दा घनचक्करको ‘म’ पात्र जस्तै कति पटक झस्केको छु । विश्वविद्यालय र देशको राजनीतिका भुलभुलैयामा रुमल्लिएको अनुभव गरेको छु । त्यसैले होला पढ्ने इच्छा भए पनि यो उपन्यास पढ्न भने डर लाग्थ्यो ।

यसपालि “घनचक्कर”पढ्दा केही भविष्यवाणीलाई ध्यान दिएँ । टावरहरूको पतन र उत्थानको प्रसङ्ग पहिले पनि याद गरेको हो । सत्तामा रहनेले टावरको निर्माणलाई अतिशय महत्त्व दिएको भएर त होला पहाडका टाकुरा र तराईका फाँटमा भ्यू टावर बनाउने ट्रेन्ड चलेको, नयाँ बनेको धरहरालाई ऐतिहासिक भीमसेन स्तम्भ नै पुनःनिर्माण गरेझैं प्रचार भएको ।
टावरहरू जबजब निरङ्कुशताका प्रतीक बनेका छन् तबतब कोही नायक जन्मिएको छ ती टावर ढाल्न । तथापि ती नायक कतै गुमनाम भएका छन् या त प्याजका डल्लामा परिणत भएका छ्न् । यिनमा मानवीय संवेदना नै छैन । आशा गरेका नेताहरूले निराश बनाएका छन् । निरङ्कुशतन्त्रको विरोध गर्नेहरू आफैं निरङ्कुश बनेका छन्, गुच्चा खेलेझैं राजनीति गरेका छन्, शक्ति संघर्षको घनचक्करमा नराम्ररी फसेका छन्, जनतालाई भ्रमको जालोमा फसाएका छन् । यस्तो संघर्षको बीचमा हर कोही धेरथोर पागल भएको छैन र ?

यस बाहेक आफ्नो जीवीकाका लागि गर्नुपर्ने दु:ख, काम र आरामका विरोधाभासमा परेर पनि मानिस घनचक्करमा परेको छ । प्रजातन्त्र र स्वतन्त्रताका आन्दोलन, आन्दोलनका उद्देश्य विपरितका गतिविधि, निरङ्कुशता अनि फेरि प्रजातन्त्रका लागि हुने संघर्ष एउटा यस्तो चक्कर हो जसबाट उम्कन प्रत्येक नागरिक प्रत्येक पल सचेत हुन जरुरी छ । घनचक्करसँग जुध्नु नै यसबाट उम्कने मुख्य उपाय हो भनेर आशावादी विचारमा उपन्यास सकिएको छ ।

यद्यपि देशमा शक्ति संघर्षका घनचक्कर चलिरहेकै छ । सञ्जीव उप्रेती सर उपन्यासको म पात्रझैं आशावादी भएर लोकतन्त्र र निरन्तर पक्षमा उभिनुभएको छ । मलाई नेपाली राजनीति बुझ्न सहयोग गरेको “घनचक्कर” आज पनि उत्तिकै सान्दर्भिक छ । कहिलेकाहीँ लाग्छ, यसमा भएका भविस्यवाणी असत्य भइदिए ! तर शक्ति संघर्ष मानवीय गुण नै हो । त्यसै यो घनचक्कर कहाँ अन्त्य हुन्छ र ?

Targets of Bullying and Social Anxiety

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After being bullied for so long, targets can develop social anxiety. They withdraw from people because they fear future attacks. The target’s spirit has been beaten down and broken and the person has been abused to the point of losing faith in humanity. Also, they’re reprogrammed to believe the bullies’ lies that they aren’t worthy of love and friendship. They are under the presumption that it’s much safer not to engage in any social interaction.

But what the target doesn’t realize is that in closing himself off from the rest of the world, he unknowingly limits himself in all aspects of life.

Humans were created to socialize and to have relationships. When targets create this invisible fortress around them, it doesn’t ensure their safety but only brings about more bullying. Bullies get their power from our fear. They are like ferocious animals who can smell fear from a mile away…

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Movie Review: The Tale of Princess Kaguya

Kaguya-hime no Monogatari (The Tale of Princess Kaguya) is a 2013 animated movie produced by Studio Ghibli and directed by Takahata Isao. Based on one of the oldest and most popular folktale, “The Tale of the Bamboo-Cutter”, the movie shows the story of a nymph who descends from the Moon to the Earth.

In his early career, Takahata was inspired by French and other European animators and the tales they told. As his career progressed, he was more engrossed in the stories of his own country. That thought gave birth to the classic “Grave of the Fireflies”, one of the saddest tales ever told in cinema. His interest in telling stories rooted to Japan reaches its height in The Tale of Princess Kaguya.

The movie is painting in motion. Beautiful water-colour hand drawn paintings made me feel like I was watching old Japanese paintings in succession. The animation looks rough (a deliberate choice), the line art gets chaotic at some points (the best use of “abstraction” as said by some of the best animators in the industry) and does what it has to do (bring the characters and story to life).

The main characters are multi-dimensional. The woodcutter seems cold at times when he uses divine powers to name Kaguya a princess and makes her stay as a noble. However, he thinks it is the best thing to happen for a child who was divine herself. Kaguya’s mother is kindlier, although she also desires to make her a princess. Kaguya herself is a fun-loving girl who dreams of escaping back to her village when she is brought to the mansion in the town. Her sense of freedom is depicted well in the scenes in which she unleashes a cat, frees a sparrow from the cage, and dances when she sees sakura in the Spring.

The movie gave me a feeling so intense it is impossible to explain in words. Takahata’s mastery of story-telling, his artistic sense and vision has produced a movie that will soon be regarded as one of the classics.